


WE HERE AT THE PRIMAL EXTINGUISHING EMPORIUM PRAETORIUM KAMIS PEST PEST VOIDSENT NOT CID PEST ALPHINAUD PRIMAL EXTINGUISHING SERVICE.

by LapisLuked



Category: FFXIV
Genre: NOT CID!!!!, Primals, ffxiv - Freeform, pests
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-15
Updated: 2017-10-15
Packaged: 2019-01-17 13:56:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12367182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LapisLuked/pseuds/LapisLuked
Summary: An ad for Primal Extinguishing Emporium Praetorium Kami, Pest, Pest, Voidsent, NOT CID, Pest, Alphinaud, Primals Extinguishing Service.Is Joke! ^_^





	WE HERE AT THE PRIMAL EXTINGUISHING EMPORIUM PRAETORIUM KAMIS PEST PEST VOIDSENT NOT CID PEST ALPHINAUD PRIMAL EXTINGUISHING SERVICE.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [amelia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/amelia/gifts).



The camera slowly pans to the man in front of a greenscreen. Its face looks as jolly as a lalafell with crack and his clothes as dirty as a morbol. "Is the camera recording?" he says with uncertainty.  
"Yeah, Yeah" says a voice behind the camera.  
"OH! HI FOLKS, MY NAME IS JOE SAMSON AND MAN DO I HAVE A DEAL FOR YOU!" He says while he puts on a fake smile. "WE HERE AT THE PRIMAL EXTINGUISHING EMPORIUM PRAETORIUM KAMI PEST PEST VOIDSENT NOT CID PEST ALPHINAUD PRIMAL EXTINGUISHING SERVICE SPECIALIZE IN EXTINGUISHING KAMIS, PESTS, PESTS, VOIDSENTS, NOT C-! PESTS, ALPHINAUDS, PRIMALS."  
"You said 'pests' three times..." says the cameraman and Joe gets a bit started but then fixes his expression.  
"WELL THAT'S JUST HOW COMMITTED WE ARE! WE STAY COMMITTED ON THE JOBS THE PEOPLE NEED MOST!"  
"Well what about Cid, you mentioned Did somewhere..."  
"Cid? Oh c-" Joe's face instantly turns into a expression of pure pain. "Eughhhh" he squeals.  
"You mean cid right?" the cameraman says with confusion.  
"Yeah ci-" Joe starts coughing up blood which seeps out of mouth. "We do not ment- *Cough* that name..."  
"Ok ok just move on."  
"WEL- *Cough* AT THE PRIMAL EXTINGUISHING EMPORIUM PRAETORIUM KAMI'S PEST PEST VOIDSENT NOT C- PEST ALPHINAUD PRIMAL EXTINGUISHING SERVICE! ARE HERE TO EXTINGUISH YOUR KAMIS, PESTS, PESTS, VOIDSENTS, NOT C-! PESTS, ALPHINAUDS, PRIMALS FOR THE LOW LOW PRICE OF 1Mil GIL AND YOUR SOUL!" he says with his jolly face unmoving "ITS EASY! JUST CALL 111-111-BAHAMUT AND WE'LL BE THERE IN TEN TO TWENTY WORK DAYS!" A graphic that says "Super Fast!" flies across the screen. "SO MAKE SURE TO CALL 111-111-BAHAMUT AND THE PRIMAL EXTINGUISHING EMPORIUM PRAETORIUM KAMI PEST PEST VOIDSENT NOT CID PEST ALPHINAUD PRIMAL EXTINGUISHING SERVICE SPECIALIZE IN EXTINGUISHING KAMIS, PESTS, PESTS, VOIDSENTS, NOT C-! PESTS, ALPHINAUDS, PRIMALS WILL BE AT YOUR DOOR! (In ten to twenty work days)."

**Author's Note:**

> :?


End file.
